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Aquarium Installation & Maintenance 610-623-7373
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Joke of the Month
A fish goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation. Patti looks at the fish in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow. The fish says $30,000. The teller asks his name and the fish says that his name is Rainbow Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral. The fish says, "Sure, I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain fly rod and reel, about an inch long; detailed and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a fish named Rainbow Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny rod & reel. "I mean, what the heck is this??" The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick-knack, Patti Whack. Give the fish a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
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The Adventures of Fish Man
The service call reported a cloudy aquarium. It came as a surprise because I had serviced the aquarium several days earlier and it was active with healthy fish that rose to the top of the aquarium in greeting. I glanced behind my seat to make sure I had my water test kit. The master test kit had been expensive but it allowed me to easily diagnosis most aquarium water conditions and take corrective action.
Entering the establishment I greeted the receptionist and headed down the hallway. Approaching my destination I noticed several residents huddled around the front glass. This was not a surprise because many service visits turn into social gatherings with residents sharing stories of personal experiences with aquarium inhabitants. Many times there are exciting stories to share or critical pieces of information that need to be exchanged so that their “friends” continue to thrive. I enjoy opportunities to engage in their conversations because their valuable insights allow me to have a clear understanding of their expectations. Many times the addition of certain fish or decorations completely transforms an aquarium into exactly the desired result. Resident insights have also provided opportunities to remove several batches of “fry” from their aquariums that otherwise would have disappeared after several days. After six months to a year of growing in size, I return the babies to the aquarium.
Moving closer to the aquarium I began to pick up bits and pieces of conversation alerting me to the fact that something was very wrong. When they noticed my approach the residents stepped aside giving me my first glance at the aquarium. I’m not really sure but I think my first reaction was a tiny whimper.
From a distance of 5 feet I could see nothing but a glass container of white. I removed the top and light assembly to brush aside white foam. When my hand broke through the surface of the water several small mouths gasped at the surface in a desperate attempt to receive oxygen. The water was too murky to count the number of survivors but from the number of mouths I could determine there were at least six.
I reached into the water and stirred up the gravel. Immediately what I could now diagnosis as bread or clumps of saltine crackers floated to the surface. Residents started firing questions for which I did not yet have answers. I mentioned what appeared to be bread or crackers that someone had put into the water. As soon as I provided that particular information the case was cracked.
“It was Herman. I knew it. He can’t just leave anything alone. I told him the fish were automatically fed, but he don’t listen to nothing”, barked the resident I knew as Bill. “He’s always telling me the fish are hungry because they come to the top when he gets close to the aquarium. The other day I caught him putting a cracker in the water.” Other residents rallied around Bill and convicted Herman without need of a judge or jury. Immediately they moved onto the sentencing phase discussing various punishments. The explanation and resident response provided the humor I needed to laugh. I quickly assured the folks Herman had only been trying to help. Several wanted to argue the point until I explained my need to respond to the havoc in the aquarium.
I removed about twenty gallon of murky water and scrubbed down the entire glass interior before replacing the filter and refilling with conditioned water. Pouring in the water stirred up the remaining debris which the new filter captured. The remaining bread settled on top of the gravel and was easily removed with an additional six gallon water change.
A Happy Ending: One week after the incident my return found the aquarium clear and the fish healthy. A small sign alerting residents the lights and feeding is done automatically is posted above the aquarium and there have been no additional problems.
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